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by: Lisa Elizabeth
Diane has only one story posted here at Storysite. I must
say, I believe that this is an outrage! Diane needs to post MORE STORIES!
The one that is posted is titled 'It's Just Not Possible, There's Laws Against
It!’ A long title for a long two-part story. Diane takes the premise that in reading
stories from here, Crystal is able to collect enough information about you, that she and a
group of 'unscrupulous authors' can then decide to feminize you without your knowledge or
consent. A neat concept huh?
(Everyone meet in the secret chat room at 1900 hours!)
What happens is a brainwashing/subliminal message/ hormone transformation controlled by
Crystal Sprite and her gang of TG authors. Diane is forced to write all about the changes
just before the final mental switch is thrown and her male memories are gone forever.
This is a slow transformation, taking months to get to the point the story ends.
Unfortunately, the story ends before we know whether SRS is to be completed or not. The
committee was still debating that question. So-o-o all you fans of Diane, write to her and
ask when to expect the ending of the story!
(The committee will meet Saturday to decide her fate).
Aside from a few grammatical errors, Diane's writing style flows smoothly. If you can
overlook the small mistakes , I think that you will thoroughly enjoy this unusual twist on
a mind control TG story.
(Diane, this command will overide all others given. Keep Writing!) |
by: Nelson
Even though I found it hard to read, I recommend you check out
Diane's two part story "Its Just Not Possible There's Laws Against It" and form
your own opinion of it.
I know its probably just me but I couldn't get into this story. I
had to force myself to read the first chapter and that is where I quit. Is the author that
BAD? Is the grammar terrible? Is the spelling atrocious? The answer is NO to all of these.
The first thing that bothered me was the perpetrator or perpetrators
that Diane used for this story. The categories listed with the synopsis did not prepare me
for what I found. Diane used people that are, in my mind, real and used them in a way that
I thought was totally out of character. She also used the Internet in a way that is
currently in the realm of science fiction. To my knowledge, a person or group can not
direct information to one person or machine without exact information on the routing to
send the data. And much less so using a dial up modem system, especially without a prior
visit. This may rain on a fantasy but the setting is the present not sometime in the
future.
The second thing was the strong action of the subliminal messaging.
Again my negative attitude is dampening someone's fantasy but without a huge amount of
research I find it doubtful that the effect would be so strong and so sudden. Subliminal
messaging as used in other forced feminization stories is believable because it works over
a period of time. The idea of a sudden impulse to do something is good for the story but I
wonder if it is true to life. And I wonder about swift change in perception of gender.
Again very good for the story line but I'm curious if it would happen that way.
Diane seems to have a decent plot line although it seems a bit
rushed. She uses grammar and structure fairly well and most of the spelling was very good.
The story does need proofreading to catch some of the worst errors. These come from
misused, incorrect or a spell checker that didn't interpret the word correctly. There was
even a spot or two I thought humorous, the shaving scene was one.
If you like it let Diane know.
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